Emo the Emotional Elf update #author #christmas #book #elves #emotions #autismawareness #anxiety #mentalhealthawareness #EmotheEmotionalElf

Hi all Emo is staring to arrive with people now , so waiting for some feed back.

When you write a book like this book and it is real life very personal story,

About a families journey and to raise awareness plus it has special dedications to those we love.

It is like opening your raw self up, not really a very easy thing to do so publicly, but for me I have seen and experienced that by doing that it helps us relate to others journeys through life. It helps others share not only with us but too others, it makes it worth so much more.

I know deep inside there are fiction books inside me but non fiction was the way I wanted to enter the world as an author.

I am realising just how theraputic writting is for me, it helps channel some intense emotions, as soon as I write something whether a big post tweet or even linkedin post. It just brings a sense of calm.

Today I am feeling a little nostalgic Niki keeps talking about marrying her Tom. I found where I put my wedding dress and washed it. Mum’s kind of want to pass these things a long but I want Niki when it is time to choose one that’s right for her.

Plus I was about Niki’s age when I choose my dress, I think I have tried it on about three times since I got it and it still fits like it was made for me not bad after 24 years.

I used to write a lot of soppy letters too my hubby when we first met , I still have every single one even the ones telling him we were expecting.

I guess I. A little bit of a hoarder of memories, I spent about a month last year putting them In order with photo’s almost like a story time line of our marriage.

I guess my soul attached to his that very first day and it still feels the same.

Other than that it has been a very quite day here Jake c.e back from his nans Niki is excited because her Tom is in England getting the camp set up with his parents before Niki goes to join them.

Niki came and sat with me for a while this evening I guess I can be a bit annoying as every time she tried to take a selfie I face bombed it 😀she was like “Muummm” but she laughed so wasn’t to upset.

My hubby now has gone down with the nasty man flu as Jake likes to call it. I have been making sure he has fluids rest and company.

I am a bit of a fuss pot, I guess that is the carer in me.

That’s the part of me that doesn’t shut down or take a break.

Got to speak to my oldest son Josh again tonight always love our little chats his voice bring joy to me and his dad.

I love just sitting and listening to him and his dad chat, on so many topics, infact it’s one of the things I like the most.

That and my hubby telling me stories from when he was a DJ: and playing songs whole story telling , it kind ofakes me chuckle a little when he just gets to the gold part presses play on the song and instead of music out pops a really over loud commercial you have to wait like ten seconds till it stops before the song plays, his little huff of frustration that it interrupted him.

My aunty revieved her copy of the book today she even sent a picture of it, that’s what I like to see visuals itales it feel real, that’s why I wanted photo’s as apposed to illustrations the book has a little of both through out .

Any way that’s my update for today

If anyone gets my book please be kind a leave. Little note or review it can mean all the difference to gettimg the book out there at the same time raising awareness for many things

All my love Faye

Emo the Emotional Elf update #author #book #elves #emotions #autismawareness #anxiety #mentalhealthawarness

Hi all well we are into the first week of the summer holidays here been very busy with work and the kids.

Still writing my little updates to advertise the book. and although it is primarily a Christmas book and it is still summer, getting copies out there so we can get some reviews for the publishers sites and the many sites that are selling will help with sales in the run up to christmas.

I am a very proud hard working mum, I love everything about being a mother, I love everything about being a carer for my work.

It is hard on both counts but a blessing and very rewarding, there are many little fantasic elf stories that come out around December time with many parents themselves now getting very inthusiastic and creative with there own elf ideas.

I love reading all of them, they make me laugh and smile. I love seeing my news feeds filled with families having fun and actually spending time together .I think elves and fairies and many of these grate little things brought to life by parents, and children of all ages.

Our Emo as you can tell has followed us passed christmas and helped us carry on bring fun, laughter and a spirit to face the challenges and difficult days.

Niki and Jake have been AWSOME as usual. Jake has been staying with his nanny who he wants to help and has been washing floors for her, he has also helped with the dogs, we are trying to let him do new things lately now he is thirteen he wants to show he is responsible little challenges like walking up the road to shops that one he has mastered very quickly although I think he runs all the way there and back so quickly, we had a miner anxiety and panic attack from him today as he asked nan if he could walk the dogs he took the first one put and got back with no issues, so many said he could take the other dog, poor Jake got a little lost ,.and had anxiety, but managed to knock and tell someone he was lost and could he use there phone. He wouldn’t go in there house as he knows that’s not allowed so he waited outside with the dog while they phone our house I was not there but thankfully his dad was and he asked them to watch him till I got there.he spoke to Jake and told him I was on my way which helped Jake alot.

It was not far for where he was staying with his nan just round the corner, the relief on his face when I got there said it all. I thought he might want to come home but no he wanted to stay another night with his nan.

I think it may be a while before he wants to go out for a walk on his own again but will try again. Things you fear when you have anxiety, are difficult to overcome sometimes.

Jake did the right thing he got so much praise and hugs, I hope it will not be such a bad memory for him and maybe we can turn it into a positive thing that he faced a challenge and found the correct solution and he was ok, he was safe.

Times are difficult for parents now to let kids be as free as we were growing up, I guess it is why sometimes we get a little over protective, but I was calm maybe a year ago I would have been crying wreck at the though my kids had got lost, but I actually have alot of faith in my son, he also had a dog with him who I know would protect him if need be, so I wasn’t as paniked this time.

I know when you have children with anxiety disorders like my kids have and social anxiety. We think things will be hard so we act like they can’t or we shouldn’t let them do things, to prevent the anxiety happening it just doesn’t work like that anxiety is something that is just there hightend or lowered at different times .many times a week a day a month.

Niki has been awesome she has been getting ready for going away with her boyfriend and his parents on Saturday

She has been stressing a little, but now she has organised her bag and we shopped for things she needs to take with her.she is relaxed again.

I am working on the first ideas for the next Emo book all ready have a title,

Emo the Emotional Elf beyond Christmas. That will be showing what happens in our every day life. How we deal with the anxiety and the challenges and also to share our fun times.

Being able to pass on a little hope and reasurrance to parents to keep up the good job.also for the children to feel the Sence of achievment when facing a a difficult They do so with Thier anxious brain says they can’t.

So my words press is a mixture of photos and written word because it needs to be as real as possible to our journey

Have a beautiful day

Best wishes Faye

Emo the Emotional Elf update #author #christmasbook #elves #emotions #autism #anxiey #mentalhealth

Hi all, hope your day is good, time will tell wether my book will sell or get revenues I hate the suspence.

My goodness it messes so much with my emotions it’s hard always channelling them. I feel like an imposter dabbling in this new world bare my soul in the form of a book,

Disability, mental health,autism, anxiety, depression, it has followed my family for many years we can’t change it it is always there.

I guess the book as much as it is about fun loving elves is more to me then that.It is so personally attached to the heart of my family.

I am going to be total honest  on bad days we seem to all withdraw and isolate our selves from each other I think it is more of a protective and self healing thing knowing that your not at your best and wanting to protect your loved ones from how you feel.

We got good at that hiding from each other, not talking about important things shutting it down and just pretending it isn’t happening this is something I hate having hanging over us.

I think it is a primal human thing to protect one’s heart.

I have learnt alot you can’t hide things they have a way of coming back a keeping you in a place that prevents you from healing prevents you from trusting.

We are made up of many emotions isn’t it an important thing to recognize all of them pay attention to all them emotions. So that they don’t hinder growth, love.

I will always feel like an imposter in the writting form because scars from a very young age are hard to get over .

I remember being six and having extra lessons to help with spelling there was one perticular word that I just could get or remember the pressure of remembering trying for weeks on end to spell (Yaught) it is still there this over whelming pressure to not mess up my words.

When I read I love reading so very much I have read thousands of books in my life time starting with Peter and Jane the old ladybird books.

I have a big interest in reading anything, from true stories, romance novels, kids book with my own kids.

But even encyclopedia’s and  medical journals, the medical journals come from a fond memory of sitting in my Nans house, hearing talk about medical issues between my mum nan and aunts.

I guess our family has kept the doctors nurses and everyone in that type of work busy for years.

Maybe I should of chosen a medical researcher as a job, I could of if I new how to pronounce the words.

I don’t like to leave medical or mental health to fester till it is dangerous.

I am always proactive on preventing illness, getting fit and healthy.

You know it is not easy to manover around the online side of this especially.

When you work hard at getting your wordpress started, the fact that it would ultimately shares to my other sites like Facebook, Twitter and linkedin made it alot easy, for me anyway I am wondering how now the impact on our WordPress sites for some of us newbie published authors, not being able to share automatically will be affected by it I know I have more chance of getting my writting and book out there using all these but being a parent of 2 children on the spectrum and as a carer for my work how much time I can get to copy and paste URL . For me I find it highly frustrating doing that it takes time and I tend to rush that’s when I make the miner mistakes with my words.

I still now go back after I published and occationaly correct things if I have time. But also if my brain notices the mistakes.

Maybe by continually checking over and over I take a little bit of the passion and flare when I write it the first time.

How many of you are more established,? How long does it take to reach bigger audiences?

I have insomnia some nights because my kids do I can’t sleep till they are asleep. This I think is the only time I can write and read others posts I am trying to read as many other wordpress pages as I can because to engage with them I think is important I might take a little time to comment or like but right now I am trying to understand others passions and stories .

You are all great writers on here, I don’t want to be sitting on a bench forever watching others i am here to stand up and be counted as a published author, even when my self doubt comes in there is a man beside me saying he is proud that is the most AWSOME feeling.

I could go on talking forever but my brain is starting to hurt 😀

I always sign my posts like a letter because it is almost a diary just a very public one now and that is always a good thing getting my thoughts out of my head and on to paper. The biggest change of my life, I feel exposed and vunrable but also empowered and strong iam all of those things.

Have a beautiful week

Love Faye

 

Emo the Emotional Elf, update #author #christmas #book #elves #emotions #autism #anxiety #mentalhealth #praderwilli

Hi all.  Emo the Emotional Elf`s Digital footprint is getting bigger by the day, dont forget to grab a copy and leave a review all new authors need that support to start with.

It  has been a busy couple of days, the weather here in south of England has been the hottest in such along time here. we haven`t felt the affects of the holidays yet as we have been hiding indoors with multiple fans going. let me tell you sitting on a leather coated chair in shorts in hot weather is just not a very good idea it burns if you stand up quick.

The kids have been having sleep ins guess my body clock still has to change as the last couple of days it is still in school mode, i sit quietly having my morning coffee and check my emails, while in the back ground on the TV is either some kids program or some over zealous advert selling a product where they get that enthusiasm i dont know, i am still trying to muster up enough courage to do my first video update.

I have though about what i would say and it sounds great in my head, but actually saying it out loud i get all tong tied and muddled with my words then i get truly frustrated at myself and give up. i will get there soon after all i have over come a lot to get to this point.

I am more able to talk to many people through writing now, which for me is an amazing success, i think it is a matter of being able to show the same person i am when i am writing   displaying it with coming across as wooden and awkward as that isn`t who i am any more.

As well as being an incredibly hard worker, mum and somewhat annoying wife, i have a wicked sense of humor , somethings maybe i shouldn`t laugh at but sometimes thats just full on nervous energy. i am quite a clumsy at times i drop things all the time, or walk into things, yes that is something that happens a lot more than i like.

when i am extremely busy i have a tendency to rush which makes me either forget what i went to shop for or where i put something, although i always seem to remember where i move my hubby`s things to when he is looking for them just not my own things like keys, phone, if it wasn`t attached to my body i would probably lose my brain too, (only joking).

Yesterday Hayley who i care for had a bit of a moment that ended up with a visit to a&e she had purple cast on her arm only fitted a week ago, i got a call early yesterday to say she had in fact got something stuck down it and it was hurting, so i collected her from her home and went to the local a&e. Unfortunately for us they can`t do anything because it is fiberglass cast so had to go to a&e further away.

So off we drove while on the way i was trying to find out more about what she had got stuck and when she did it , she said i put a felt tip in to scratch and the lid got stuck so i put a paint bush down to get it out and that broke and got stuck too, i choose to make light of it so that she was calm when we went to hospital, although i did remind her firmly she can`t put things down her cast.

On the way on this 30 minute drive to the other hospital i played high school musical songs and was singing my heart out she even joined in a bit , did the trick of keeping her relaxed. get to the hospital not a very long wait this time. They called us in removed the cast and put a temporary one on and said to phone fracture clinic in the morning.

At this point we went home neither of us having dinner yet, it was about nine pm when i got back to Hayleys her dad had her dinner and medicines all ready you see hayley is epileptic as well and normally has her medicines at 7.30 pm this is partly because she needs the 12 hours between each dose and a major part of it is routine for Hayley as she takes them when coronation street finishes. routines are hugely important not just for those with autism but prader willi syndrome too. Change in routine can cause major meltdowns for Hayley, something we like to avoid at all costs.

It is like that a lot we have made a change at her day canter so she gets to go out with staff on a Tuesday now, i give her £10 to take with her every Monday night when she comes to me the first thing she says before hello is have you got my money for tomorrow.

If someone gives her a cake on a Wednesday she will want it every Wednesday, this is something we have to be very strict with because of her Prader willi syndrome, hayley has lost five and a half stone since i became her carer she is less at risk of diabetes and other complications, now her seizures have gone from multiple big seizures to just the staring ones and that is down to medicine control and diet. i am not saying she doesn`t have any at all just that we have better control over them now, at this moment we are working hard together on health and fitness and her emotions she enjoys being evolved with Emo and the Elves and the book, she is communicating her feelings much better now and is even starting to give hugs and  Talk about her feelings over losing family members and friends.

Sometimes i think people don`t realise just how much work it takes to achieve the things we have together and with mum and dad and everyone that works with her, it isn`t always easy as she can be quite full on when she has changes happening.

She has a lot of repetitive behaviour when you address one thing she will find something else to replace it. Situations can become intense quick but just recently since the elves came along she is listening more and more joining in more and more and even smiling more, she is a very sociable woman as well and has friends every where she is trusting of everyone, she is not good yet at keeping things private when out and about and says things she may have heard and isn`t suppose to repeat, that can lead to a few awkward smiles.

She is a fantastic woman though with a heart of gold, she said to me the other day i am proud of you for writing the book , its your book noone wrote it but you. The book does mention epilepsy and prader willi but just the names on  word press and my other sites thats where the real awareness can happen being able to talk about it in more depth is where real awareness comes in,

Hayley had her new cast put on today a very quick in and out visit the staff were amazing, i have seen such a change when going to hospitals lately in the way they help,maybe it is because i high light there extra needs when booking in or that i try to be more laid back, understanding has to be in those we go to for help especially hospitals.

I have to give them a lot of credit lately for how they are with her now.

This evening i am on a night shift with Hayley little Tom and holly and Ellie, but that is for another update. i use the book and the elf not only with my children but also those i work with it realy is enriching and rewarding and a blessing and just so much fun.

much love

and thanks for all new followers i really appreciate you all

Faye xx

 

Emo the Emotional Elf update #author #christmas #elves #emotions #autism #anxiety #mentalhealth #Family

 

Hi guys Emo the Emotional Elf update
I know it’s just over five minutes long this video
But I wanted to show the journey from first pen to paper in December 2016 to now having the book published.
The video to me is important to show how much the book has helped our family face the challenges the accomplishments and the achievements we have had since then.
The thing that is prominent throughout is the fun and laughter.
As a family we have had losses and new members we sadly over the years have been busy with our own families and only seemed to get together to say goodbye to the ones we lost.
But since then we have managed to get together for the happier times and really started to learn to talk share and just be us.
This is an important step in the right direction.
The kids are thriving I am thriving as a family we are going on to bigger and better things.
We sure are more capable of doing great things .
We are becoming nurses, teachers, buisness men engineer’s childcare specialists and many more different careers ,mothers and fathers grandparents ,aunts and uncles . Them me an Author then are many things our family bring to this world other than the words on a diagnosis sheet we are us we are real and the world better get ready because here we come.
Enjoy the video

Emo the Emotional Elf update #EmotheEmotionalElf #publishedauthor #christmas #elves #emotions #anxiety #mentalhealth

Hi all wow the end of summer school term, wasn’t half as bad infact it was great few issues with Jake’s school due to funding issues and the communication with us paremts but that is something I guess they need to work harder at next term. Wow Niki has just amazed us with he continued strength and steps towards her own future, she has done her exams including GCSE English and arts awards enterprise. She has been on the student council, Christmas plays, school play.

She has worked with other students and helped teach one to use a fork and drink from a cup she started work experience on the school site and applied for college and been accepted for level one child care and health and social care course.

She has learnt techniques to help refuse her anxiety, learnt how to swim going to all lessons with a high level of determination. She has worked hard on her relationship with Tom built AWSOME friendships.

She has even taken her little brother to the toy shop she has learnt to navagate her own way home from college where she did a taster course.

Using buses. All these things that her previous schools said she wouldn’t be able to do guess the girl proved them wrong on so many levels .

She is taking a big stride towards understanding her own health, she was fabulous at the dentist on the last to occatiins she even has blood tests on her own now. I am just more proud then she could ever really know. I think she is beautiful smart funny outstanding in my eyes.

She still has the same amount of anxiety and still has autism and tourettes that will never change,

She does need support just that support is different now than while going through diagnosis and many exclutions and other things that had an impact on her at that time.

It is always one day at a time and that is really ok, that is what she needs at the moment,

She also designed the Emo the Emotional Elf on the front cover of my book her own interpretation of our Elf .

Jake as well has come so very far his attendance has gone up from school refusal and 56% attendance to over 90% I would be 100% but we have to take hospital appointments when they come because if waiting lists.

He has gone up to top set English and loves it. Spanish didn’t really work for him and was the most challenging lesson so that he managed to attend sometimes, geography he loves maths he is catching up been a bit rocky at times but next year I am hoping he will have less anxiety. He has chosen his options had a big op, continued with his kungfu when able too, started phisio therapy, helped me with my book.jake also has improved with medical and dental visits.

He has made new friends more so online and has proved to be a great help to other children on Thier lifting Thier spirits when they are down.

He is growing so fast at the mo.ent a big growth spurt he is starting to try new foods they may only touch his mouth for a moment but he will eventually eat a wider range of foods I see it happening in the not to distant future.😁 Jake is learning so quickly now he has started.showimg an interest in world politics and what’s happening In the woeld. Which I beileve will I have his GCSE Geography , he has always had a vast voucabuary and a big knowledge and understanding of fiction now his developing I’m his non fiction I think writting the book and including him every step of the way has impower his learning again. Jake is still my bouncy flappy youmg man and like Niki his diagnosis will always be there but having the correct support at school has made school life easier then it was .

So I guess that’s my update for today now it’s waiting for people to purchase the book and leave reviews that is the next step of our book journey.

Many thanks

Faye

Emo the Emotional Elf update, #author #christmas #elves #emotions #autism #anxiety #mentalhealth

Hi all i hope this update finds you all in a settled place , one thing i know about emotions and and mental health and autism and anxiety, is that days can be very mixed we as parents or carers learn to adapt and be content with what it takes to have these things in our life.

we cannot change that but we can learn to grow and help ourselves along the way, the last couple of weeks have been so very busy and so relaxing at the same time, spending time with our oldest son. celebrating his birthday and my book, and all the amazing changes, progress and life experiences we have had over the last year it seems our life now has begun to change for the better.

There is certainly a lot more acceptance and understanding of the diagnosis that my children have and while no parent or person wants to be seen as a diagnosis without it the support and understanding is vastly lacking the fight for services will always continue as our country start to grow in understanding that these support services make a huge difference to the lives of those who may need it.

Me i am still learning as much as i can to help my kids negotiate life, to live to laugh to love to thrive. for the children it is still a little difficult to understand why them, and why others can be their still trying to figure out where they fit in.

For Niki at her graduation the other day i think she felt it she was so excited to be moving back to mainstream college, when the day finally came to say goodbye to her teachers and friends she didn`t expect to feel the sadness she felt. when she first went to this special school it was difficult, not because the school was wrong, but because the years of exclusion and inability had made it so very difficult for her to trust anyone. the first few months there she will say were hard she pushed people away, but one thing change and it stayed changed the exclusions didnt happen infact the school didn`t send her home and i didn`t pick her up either. I know that was the best thing for her she was able to learn to self regulate and understand her own emotions, the school understood that she did infact have tourettes as well as autism and really bad anxiety.

This really did make a huge difference on how others perceived her as a person, in time the verbal side of the tourettes calmed a little, and she learned to channel it to small physical tics, you see schools have a small understanding of autism but the other hidden diagnosis like tourettes and anxiety are the things that are more difficult for them to understand. the more pressure the more it happens the more attention to it the more stress and it is like a circle going round. the stress and anxiety build witch then makes the tics happen more.

Both Niki and Jake also have issues with sensory aspect as well, the physical things affect them to Jake has to now have tests for vitamin d deficiency, Niki has started her cause of it and folic acid due to being a little anemic. as you can see these issues may be tiny but to us they are big.

My family to me no matter what i am proud, what ever comes up i am as a mum more centered to deal with it, it was over whelming and anxiety inducing and pretty scary to start with but now it is OK,  Now we are ready and more than capable of facing these challenges head on, of staying grounded to who we truly are and where we fit into this world, and it is like before, only better stronger and wiser.

This year i have seen them go to prom, take tests, sit in a dentist chair have blood tests and build new relationships with others i see them learning to trust again i have seen them show a great understanding to others in how they act i have seen them overcome a lot.

We also have had a lot of family pass over the last couple of years it is a lot for a family to take in, process and adjust to but really we are only just beginning to fully understand and be cool with all the emotions we as human beings go through.

life doesn`t have to be complex and complicated, it is what we do to change our perception of ourselves.

love to you all have a beautiful week ahead

Faye xxIMG_20180116_145852_907