Emo the Emotional Elf #emotions #selfhelp #anxiety #mentalhealth #autism #exams

New week new beginning

Been keeping the atmosphere here as relaxed as can be coming into GCSE time.

Calm relaxed Mum and Dad = relaxed kids, there is a lot of truth in that statement, us parents can sometimes be super stressed that our kids needs are met during exam time that we don’t always realise the kids pick up on it.

Probably true for most parents realy but add kids with additional needs to the mix and anxiety disorders can be something of a ticking time bomb we never no from one minute to the next when anxiety is going to come into play.

I Have been through many school tests being a mother of three over the last 20 years when i say 20 years really mean 20 years of school runs, homework, sats, Gcse’s, a levels , uni degrees.

Plenty of graduations and changes of schools some expected, some not through choise but the right decision in the end. we still have many years to come with education as well.I have found it exhilarating, frustrating, so much joy and so much stress that is what it is like to be a parent, there through good and bad. for Niki and Jake a great start was made , then the years of bumpy up and down ride of schools. But finally they are both enjoying education at school and learning they are thriving. do they still need support thats a big yes. Without it things may slowly slip the other way not a chance i am willing to risk thier education is vitally important.

Niki finished and passed the child care level one, she is completing her placement which is going well. so now the only thing left is maths GCSE, if she didn’t go through multiple changes of schools or exclusions she would have already completed maybe three years at college but then would she have made the progress she has made now without them, would she have the resilience to give it another go, who knows i no the woman i see before me now is vastly different from the girl who went through diagnosis.

She is really beginning to show what she is truly capable of . Today’s perpetration for her Maths exam began before she left the house, happy positive mood from all of us we were up early had breakfast and even time for some jokes music and Tik Tok’s .

Niki has adaptions in place for exams a separate room, extra time, breaks if needed and Jaffa cakes , Why the Jaffa cakes we found that anxiety mimics the feeling of hunger in the tummy so having a snack makes her tummy settled so she can concentration, she eats healthy all the other times now and has limited sugery foods. but in this situation she feels it really helps.

Her anxiety before meant she never used the whole time or went over she just wanted to get it done but today she used the allocated time and checked her answers changed the ones she though she answered wrong, and managed every question in the exam.

Her words when she phoned after, all finished I smashed it , I answered all the questions, feel really good about it , I didn’t cry. That is all that matters to me she did it and feels good. 2 more to go and hopefully that is maths all wrapped up.

A big smile going into Exam and coming out

But there is more she wasn’t expecting a treat but i think she more than deserved it for all her hard work lately she choose a mermaid tale and a new doll for her collection, something that started when she very first took her GCSE’s back in her old mainstream and alternate provision schools.

Her collection of dolls is a positive thing as she can be very creative with them. I it is really will try to upload the video she made it is really cool and took her a little time. not sure if it will upload in this article though.

Jake

Jake choose his first suit the other day he looks so grown up, as you are probably aware sensory issue can cause a few issues as far as clothes go.

But he was happy with it, the shoes he is not so sure of he likes shoes to be the same A) with grippers b) the same as his usual ones. The ones we choose are very grown up suit ones not the usual super market brand we found he loves. They are also Laces something he hasn’t mastered yet because he will only wear grippers as he finds them easy and comfortable .

OH THE JOYS OF GROWING UP !!

My handsome young man, growing way too quickly, the baby of the family.

Hayley

Dentist star

A new challenge faced and one by Hayley

Hayley had her next dentist appointment she coped very well, we thought she was just having a deep clean but then the dentist through in a filling and a needle, for a moment just a split second she looked shocked then she just layed back and let them do it. we ended up keeping her off the day centre for the day because she was shaky after.

sometimes stress can bring on a seizure but this time she had a lay down and was fine, the best thing is she didn’t clamp her teeth into dentist finger or need staff to pry her mouth open. I just kepted saying how well she was doing. The thing is my kids are learning from her and she from them each wanting to over come the things that cause anxiety.

Josh

My oldest haven’t seen him since Niki’s birthday and the trip to his, home but in June we will all spend a couple of days together we are super excited to see him again and will be attending a family wedding together. It is funny we talk almost every day together first me then my hubby the highlight of our evening having a good old chat about anything and everything .

MY HUBBY

My Nik has been continuing his work in the garden, fixing fences, doing the vegetable patch planting the plants. but also been a real big help like going up the shops and getting things we need me, I have been resting when i am not sorting the kids or working.

we have a great thing going here at the moment seamlessly working together , I have spent more time then I should watching him while he works , he always makes me feel calm (when he doesn’t get on my nerves) only joking .He makes me forget my words, be goofy around him in a teenage crushy type of way. not always sure i like that he affects me but he does not in a bad way but he simply does.

As you can see some vibrant colours and he is breathing life in to our own little sanctuary.

We also have some additions

Our ever so smiley scarecrow, the fairies have also moved a couple more houses to our garden ready for the kids to explore and visit when they come .

well thats all for today’s update, find hobby’s have quite space, and time for yourselves as adults hard i know sometimes a trip to the toilet is followed by little people calling. Seriously though finding a calmness as an adults rubs off on your kids.

Good night

Much love Faye xx

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Emo the Emotional Elf #author #emotions #family #anxiety #mentalhealth

Hi all how are you today, been a few days since I updated,

Been taking some thinking time plus lots happening here.

Hayley had dentist Tuesday or she was ment too but when we got there the dentist had a family emergency, so we had to rebook missed there phone call as I was dropping the kids to school. Still couldn’t be helped sorted it for early Monday so she doesn’t miss a whole day at day center.

Wednesday we were working on book for a while but also working with Hayley, Wednesday’s are a day I take her out and she can eat what she wants for lunch no diet day,

After work it was onto Jake’s parents evening, the results of recent test are outstanding and boy has he worked hard on catching up.

His teachers only had great things to say, he hit ended of year targets and surpasted them in science he has already hit end of year 11 targets in that and he is year nine.

His teacher made us laugh, but also mentioned she can’t keep Jake in her class as it isn’t fair to him he needs to move to top set.

But this poses a slight issue how can Jake still get support he may need when his assistant is supporting 2 other children who are staying in that class, Jake says he is ready to move up and be challenged but if he has to go without support he will.

This is something I may need to speak to them about at some point, his new teacher needs to pick up anxiety and issues like his ta does.

Not sure how that will work as there are many students .

Jake and I discussed that he will have to speak if there is an issue.

Before this night a part from the Ehcp

Meeting Jake hasn’t come with me to parents evening, the reason is seak openly about strenghs and weak areas. He asked to come and be involved this time πŸ˜€

The veg and herbs are all now in and ready to just grow.

Today we got a few new plants for back of garden

Yesterday I had blood test done should get results Monday and my new glasses come on Friday.

Today finished on a real positive note a night out with both mum and dad

Other news also put huge smile on my face Niki got up and sang again as did myself ,Niki and Begx so nice seeing them just enjoying it there. They just sang there hearts out.

Jake spent the evening at home with his dad , bonding over Transformer Bumble Bee movie and my little Jake’s first shave 😡 time had gone so fast if you have little kids enjoy every moment πŸ’—

No moustache very proud of himself

Any way. Good night have a beautiful night

Much love Faye XX

Emo the Emotional Elf #author #emotions #anxiety #autism #mentalhealth

Good evening all how has your day gone?

So today has been the best day the Migriane and fuzzy head has slowly disappeared and I feel more relaxed then ever, the veggie garden has started to come together thanks to my hubby

Still some planting to do to Finnish off but really looking forward to home growing the initial expense is well worth it.

When Hayley arrived here this afternoon she was excited to see I had cabbage and Brussel sprouts ready to plant. It really is starting to pay off and transfer to the kids and those I work with talking about health, emotions, mental health, and all the things it takes to be healthy from inside out.

Niki reached her target weight in a healthy way, excercize and cutting out the bad habbits she still gets he odd treat day but doesn’t crave them so much, most of that is her own will power but also the Metformin is helping her alot aswell. She doesn’t over excersize and has a set time every day to do her workout on Wii fit. She has now started adapting and changing it when need be.

Hayley uses her excercize bike for about half an hour aswell, plus she does more walking about, I have noticed where she is losing weight too she is becoming less breathless and the weeks go by.

Hayley has also learned to tell people at the day center if she wants to change something to her scedual and they have been very adaptive to that.

Having swimming once a week, going out and about shopping, arts , drama that’s Hayley’s favorite plus filming she likes to also be behind the camera too.

Routine is kind of important to my kids but also Hayley and others I work with, but they are also learning change is good to.

  • Education
  • Health
  • Daily living skills
  • Money
  • Medicine
  • Yearly reviews
  • Ehcp
  • Mental health
  • Emotional health
  • Anxiety
  • Depression
  • Huntington’s
  • Safe gaurding
  • Social media
  • Social skills
  • Bullying
  • Healthy eating
  • Excersize
  • Doctors
  • Hospitals
  • Dentist
  • Sleep
  • Sensory
  • Eyes
  • Hearing
  • Support services
  • Social services
  • And sometimes police
  • Organising
  • Driving
  • Self esteem and resilence training
  • These are just a few things in our daily life that get talked about, happen and I handle every day.

    It’s a big part of seeing the over all situation, you need to be able to handle it all either as a carer or parent of kids with additional needs.

    It can be frustrating sometimes even for those that have been doing it for a long time, don’t think we have all the answers we learn as we go along to having the ability to adapt to different scenarios. Different moods , different settings. Different situations that come along.

    Sometimes communication is grate sometimes it needs alot more work,

    When I say that I mean services.

    What works , what doesn’t.

    • Long waiting times
    • Funding
    • Better understanding in general for kids or even adults issues
    • Lack of places to go that helps keep kids on track.
    • Looking at the bigger picture not just at families , but the system that is supposed to be safe that’s meant to encourage and inhanced learning for all students.
    • More mental health training
    • Councillors in schools
    • Increased Sen support in mainstream settings autism awareness just isn’t enough, better understanding of anxiety, mental and emotional health for teachers and support staff so that all students can learn.
    • Less exclusions because to be honest by displaying behaviour that gets the student excluded they aren’t learning resilence in school.
    • Bullying I have been around many schools and the posters and talk about bullying and what is or isn’t bullying is just not enough if when a child says they are affected and are being bullied they feel unheard because to them it is.
    • Politicians getting out and going to schools and talking to the students that recieve the services.
    • Ofsted they need to sometime just turn up unannoused. And on those abounded visits with pre warning to children who dont’t like change ,speak to children without any one from the school present
    • The reason I say this is because vunrebal children will always want to please those around them, so they are less inclined to talk about things like bullying, or other issues they may have at school with a adult from school present.
    • May be they can do a bit of both.

    So when I say caring I like to say how it really is because we a not part of the solution if we don’t say what it really envolved all the things done in one day for many of us carers or parents , or family members .

    So caring isn’t just one or to small things it is many things that need very good adpations made. To think there are many young carers out there missing out of a little of life,

    Jake Gave me a mini piano concert tonightπŸ˜€πŸ’—

    Anyway that’s all for tonight

    Good night all

    Much love Faye xx

    Emo the Emotional Elf #author #emotions #autism #anxiety #mentalhealth

    Hello all hope your day has been AWSOME !!

    Happy mother’s day to all those celebrating todayπŸ’–

    We have had a beautiful relaxing and peaceful day here today.

    A bit of gardening from my hubby and his Green fingers it is starting to take shape now and looking lovely.

    We are onto the vegetable patch next,

    A selection of salad’s and vegetables,

    The herbs are fantastic this year already growing and thriving.

    Being able to go pick your own to use in home cooked meals is very satisfying.

    This is just the beginning, much too Jake’s horror I bought some Brussel sprouts to plant πŸ˜‚

    lousy sense of direction πŸ‘ˆπŸ‘‡πŸ˜΅

    That’s me or so I thought ,my dad told me where to go to get to garden center, I followed his directions it wasn’t that far from where I live.

    I ended up driving round in circles down country lanes I stopped and put Google maps on my phone only for GPS to quit working, just my luck but it was all ok the weather was sunny and warm the music playing my favorite tunes while I stopped I phoned my dad back he had given me the wrong directions by one road turning.

    Once he told me the right way I got there in no time.

    It was lovely just walking around making the selection of things to plant.

    Tomatoes, onion, garlic, lettuce 2 types.

    Green beans, cabbage, Brussels,red hot chilli peppers and beetroot. Not to mention some strawberries.

    That’s enough to start us on our journey.

    Each year we get a little more adventurous with planting each year our garden is making us smile.

    The thing in like most is just pottering around with my Nik and the kids a little bit of sorting ready for school and the week ahead, the garden, and of course the lovely roast dinner.

    We had roast beef today the full works roast potatoes parsnips, carrots and minty pees and Yorkshire pudding, topped off with a rich and tasty gravy.

    Niki are everything but the meat and gravy and of course our Jake had plain pasta cooked with a touch of garlic and some butter, soonish and green grapes.

    We used fresh rosemary for the potatoes, the freshest mint for the pees and corriander and parsley for the salad.

    We like to add a little Greek to our dinners even if they are a traditional English dish so things like olives, Halomi, little peppers Taramasalata, and Houmos

    flowers on the table a bottle of red which I don’t drink but still it goes nice with a roast. We also like fresh crusty bread just to dip in the Gravy juices

    All this followed by a movie today was Meg , the one about a Megalodon

    Not sure on that spelling but hopefully right.

    Jake came watched too is one of his special interest marine life and dinosaurs.

    Jake woke very early today and by about one he fell asleep and I had to wake him for dinner he ate so quick and went back too sleep, until about 7.30.

    We woke him for his bath when he finnished he said “mum I will have to be super quick or I will be late for school” bless him he thought it was Monday morning, now though it’s 10.30 pm and he is wide awake and full of energy. Maybe a long night.

    Book Emo the Emotional Elf

    Now to Finnish off this week and get it live for sale again, minor things now ready to just get on with it.

    Still have to also do the proper book trailer ready for the relaunch too.

    Apologies

    You know when you have a bad day and you lose your cool, and it isn’t the person your talking too’s fault it just happens, you forget it over time but it plays on your mind that you owe an apology, then you try and think of away of approaching the subject but feel awkward. Well just say it it really feels good to do that.

    And it doesn’t fester on your mind when you think of that person this I learnt to do alot, it also has to be sincere I think back to the times we went through diagnosis and other issues and I wasn’t as cool and calm as i am now I was bewildered overwhelmed by many things, trying hard to keep control of a situation , trying to get my family through a difficult time.

    I am glad I learned so many vital lessons since them.

    Have a beautiful evening πŸ˜€β€οΈ

    Much love Faye XXX

    Emo the Emotional Elf #author #emotions #selfhelp

    Hi all how is your week Finishing.

    This week has been slightly different busy with work, and family but also a week of appointments for myself, the Migriane I had a week ago still lingers now not as painful but still the dizziness and fuzzy feeling remains today the first day it has subsided a little.

    So really had to make sure to make it more relaxed.

    The thing is when your a parent you can’t just stop doing everything, when your a worker you still have a dedication to carry on through it.

    The doctors are going to run a blood test and see how it goes as they seem to be intensifying when they hit.

    They advised an eye check which did result in some fresh glasses but they confirmed not to be the cause of the change to the migraines.

    Now we see I am so much more relaxed these days so the stress levels are not as high as they used to be.

    The one thing is I now understand what Little Jake has to go round with having syncope how that kid has managed to go to school do his work and other things shows what a strong young man he is in so many ways.

    To get a tiny glimpse into his world and the physical issues makes me understand how much he has to cope with on a daily bases.

    Anyway this is why I have not written as much as normal can’t seem to get words to go through the fuzziness.

    Goodnight may your day be peaceful for you πŸ˜€πŸ’—

    Emo the Emotional Elf #author #emotions #reading #kids #pets #writing

    Hi all how are you?

    Work and Hayley

    Here it is almost 1 am not long in from work, had Hayley for the day today this week was a quite one as she has toothache and the dentist tomorrow for a check up.

    We also were reading the book and listening to Sue’s book and audio of Harry a Cat’s Tale, now Hayley is unable to read but having both the book to look at and the audio to listen to I have hope she will learn a few words she can recognised maybe one or two.

    She already has had the audio a couple of days and listened to it herself she memorised some of the story and was talking a long with the cd, some she was repeating after the sentance was read out, some at the same time.πŸ™Œ

    she really enjoyed the story.

    Jake

    Jake messaged me from school today mum I twisted both my ankles and fell down the stairs but (don’t pick me up I am ok ) just bring car close to school when you meet me cause they hurt.

    Before getting a message like that would be a phone call striaght to the school to find out if he was alright, but I have come to learn lately not to instinctively drop everything, I am sure the school or him would call if it was really bad Plus I know why he didn’t want to come home, he had a cooking test for his catering class and didn’t want to miss it.

    He has been planning a dessert he choose to make a cherry and chocolate cheesecake. He also wanted to work hard on the presentation of his food. It looked and tasted fab, although this one he didn’t want to taste himself Mum and dad were his testers.

    As I didn’t do a post yesterday I didn’t get to say how Jake came home after school yesterday and asked if he could cook scrambled egg and have it for his dinner ,he proceeded to make it and are half a plate, for Jake this is something he should be so proud of I am slowly swing his mind changing towards food and he is beginning to want to cook and eat new things.

    He did spend a little time looking at the plate of eggs first though.

    Niki

    Niki is working so hard at college and tomorrow is back at her placement.

    There isn’t much to say but she is starting to really shine both at school and home. Her relationship with Tom still going strong her friendships are developing nicely and learning the dynamics of having a group of friends instead of one or to close ones, she has a friend coming round tomorrow.

    Work with kids and dogs tonight.

    Excersize’s and getting some of that pent up energy released before settling down together to read.

    Holly’s school home reader book her choise was Hamlet, she read extremely well we took it in turns and read the whole book together, she said she only has to read three pages a night after we read them all πŸ˜€

    What author would agree to three pages she was very engaged in the story stopping and asking questions about certain parts and explaining the story another way, it is great to see she wants to not just read but have a better understanding and grasp of what the story is about, my hubby and I did this when reading with our own kids maybe that is why they were always years ahead in reading.

    We also began the story of Buster thier dogs memory book, Ellie and holly being very active of what to put in the book so they can remember the happy things about their do who recently passed away.

     

    Little Tom

    he was so excited to see me last night

    Tom has many great carers helping him every day they are all fantastic with him and he shows that he is happy , his engagement with each of us carers is fantastic, maybe thats why he captures everyone hearts he is such a special young boy to all of us.

    Tom is very blessed to have everything he needs to help his life be as easy as possible, all the adaptions now completed on his home, hoists specialist equipment like baths, sensory and physio. he really deserves the best life he can have given his disabilities , always happy smiling , very cheeky sense of humour never gives up. That’s our Tommy.

    This i wrote last night but was too tired as finished at midnight.

    Much love Faye xx

    Emo the Emotional Elf #author #emotions #autism #anxiety #mentalhealth

    Hi all hope your day has been good πŸ˜€

    Today here I have not been much use at all migriane’s are a pain. Good job it is bank holiday and no school run.

    Having been woken up by searing head pain at 4.30 this morning and grabbing the pain killer I ended up going back to sleep till nearly 12.30 this afternoon.

    My daughter cheerfully came in and said mum dad’s made you a coffee,😊

    Waking up to everyone in super cheerful moods is an awesome thing, my hubby was even sharing music with Niki. She likes Andy Black and when she heard his first album she did not realise her dad would like her choise in music. Till he started playing and listening to it himself the joys of dad being a DJ in the past love of all musicπŸ˜‚

    She was playing his new album in the car the other day and said mum “can you not tell dad it’s out yet so I can enjoy it a little before dad here’s it something slightly uncool dad enjoying same music as you”.

    He was playing one of the older songs this morning and she said “dad if you going play his music make sure it’s up to date”

    I liked that my hubby was really cheerful today, he has been working hard in the garden he came back in and said I am going to say something and I don’t want any answers back or excuses get yourself to doctor for check up. Maybe it is why he has been a tad grumpy i try not to go to doctors for myself as much as I can.

    Carers can be a night mare when it comes to themselves sometimes, we put things off and ignore them.

    The migraines did go away for a while but have returned and with a much more painful intensity. Before stress brought them on now I am relaxed they have changed a little.

    This time though I think it’s because I had a small one at the beginning of the week and the dental surgery aggravated it.

    Had to either be sitting or lying down today very dizzy.

    So to stop him from worrying I will book that check up.

    Still sitting and resting I got to watch Niki do her TikTok’s in her prom dress still looks super cute In it. Had to go and get it out of storage in the as attic.

    Her little wigs look amazing she can change her hair colour depending on character’s she wants to play.

    Jake has been talking with his friend form school, this is something new for him, he used to say “I have no friends mum” then it was I have aquantances before moving on to my friend.

    The other day I was emotional when he said my best friends, every kid should have friends growing up.

    Now I really am starting to see all our positive parenting paying off all the stress and hard times were worth it to be at this point in time where stability and a real sense of self for the kids are happening, would this of occured if we didn’t have our friendly elf bringing so much fun and positivity to our lives the answer is maybe. But it has impacted greatly on us all in one way or another and I bless the day it happened.

    I will say goodnight to much screen time not good for my head right now.

    Much love Faye xx