Hi all how are you today,
So with autism awareness there comes a time as a parent or educator, where you are hitting that point of deeper understanding on communication style and how a perticular child processes the world’s information maybe bad events , maybe something they heard at school online while out and about or even in the community.
As large amount of input into a brain that is still growing and developing,
It’s that cross over point where you see they are trying to be heard and seen but can’t always show in a way that our minds process.
For me every kind of communication is very important, my kids are very creative and that has shown through in either Thier writing style or art work or online post, even in tick tocks,
We communicate in many different ways depending on all different kind of situations sometimes when they are highly anxious and I am not with them I get there angry text of course there not angry with me but just need a safe person to vent at and someone to help bring them back to a place where they feel more in control of Thier emotions.
Those pictures they draw that are dark and deep don’t have a go about them, yes you as a person may not understand the message straight away, you may even wander why they would draw a picture like that, and yep sometimes I am guilty of saying can’t you just draw a fluffy unicorn.
They know I understand that need to be creative and express through art some of the input life gives them.
My kids were bullied both on and offline amongst other things they were hurt physically and for sometime emotionally and that had an impact on there lives, it still does to a small decree at certain times.
I try to help them balance some of that negative input with positive things elves sometime a movie , a game reading a book. Watching programs on all different types of things. I can’t changed the bad experiences they had before but maybe just by keep showing them despite all the bad things in the world there are a lot of beautiful , things if they take just a small moment to see.
We are not the same family that hit the doctor’s surgery or the mental health teams doors all those years ago, this is what I try to show through our post, still autistic still have the other issues but now we are. Living a life that was better then it was then.
There own voice and own understanding of themselves and what is good or not good for them is slowly developing , I still do put some boundry’s in place but they are free to express there likes and dislikes ,
I can see how far my children have come , there older brother can when he see’s them for visits, the schools can, the proof is in the results .
What helped enclution , acceptance for us and them, they had a lot of difficulty accepting it Jake more than Niki. But they are understanding more themselves and independantly wanting to learn more about it themselves. They know the system didn’t help that when they needed it and want it to change for children who are diagnosed after them.
Tell you kids they can tell you anything , tell them maybe they might do something that will at sometime make you cross with them. Tell them you as parents don’t always get it right.
Tell them what ever they need to talk about how ever awkward or uncomfortable a subject they can come to you. That’s the best bit of advice I can pass on from experience .
Sometimes they are so worried about doing something wrong, or being in trouble , and want to sort it themselves, and turn things round for themselves. That they might go to someone else rather then you sometimes they don’t want to hurt your feelings either.
No subject should be taboo in house holds.
Tell them if they can’t speak to you about online things make sure they know who and where they can go.
My kids do talk openly now with me about everything but a some points they shut down and kept it all locked up.
Little bits of our journey spoken about not in the book but through blogging helps me think clearer.
The book is our little bit of sunshine that helped get us through some hard talks and emotions .
I am so thankful for that impulse buy of Emo 😁💗
Have a beautiful night
All my love Faye xx