Good evening all, how was the rest of your Monday.
School dilemma !!
So as you know from the last post I mentioned Jake’s school phoned saying he was complaining of tummy cramps well, on his part he managed the rest of the day, so that was a great thing he persevered through it.
My dilemma is as I was waiting in my usual spot just inside the main. Entrance where Jake expects to see me ,I noticed him moving towards his tutor when another student approached him to show him something on his phone they the. Walked away and he went into his class.
When the bell rang as soon as we got out of the school building, Jake said to me some boys had been saying that his friend had been saying things behind his back, Jake asked several times what but they waited to the end of the day to show him a conversation between his friend and a group of four other boys. The group of boys had a falling out over something silly and the boy who Jake normally gets on well with said ‘ stop being a Jake retard, spastic, disabled’ Of course Jake was confused as to why a friend would say this really offensive thing about him. I why the others who have been not so nice to other autistic students, I have been wondering if this is why his anxiety has been a little more over the last couple of weeks and why the return of the tummy cramps.
Getting to the dilemma do I as a parent go to school and speak to them to get them to monitor the situation, before it starts getting nasty again and have an impact on Jake’s learning because I am not happy that this goes unaddressed and have seen how quickly this turns from low level teasing to much more?
Why are his support workers not picking up on these things ? They know the support Jake needs is with feeling safe in school and making sure they pick up on these things that can easily exasperate his anxiety and have a huge impact on his ability to learn?
Also I don’t want the school to say here comes Jake’s mum complaining again.
Or do I let Jake speak to them and say it happens again he will report it.?
Do I quitely without Jake noing speak to the support workers to keep a close eye on things without mentioning it to Jake.
He Just wants to do his work and make some friends that are not crule.
Jake knows first hand that it starts with one person, then becomes a small group taking it in turns to say mean things. This is what caused his anxiety and school refusal as well as physical assults. In privious school and this school.
The subtle signs he has been showing that maybe something is going on again I pushed to one side but after today I don’t think it is something that should be ignored. 9×out of 10 when he does talk it gets worse .
So this is my dilemma,? If you have any tips please share by leaving a comment
Jake is so much stronger than he was but that is because the anxiety has been lessoned by not having to deal with pretty crule behaviour of others.
I have said I will let him speak to the not tomorrow and see of he can make him see what he said was not nice. But that I would speak to school of it happens again.
This is the very reason Jake does not have social media yet not because he is not a sensible young man but because of how others behave towards him.
Much love Faye
If you have been in a similar situation what would you have wanted your parents to do.