My Princesses turn 18,

For today`s update i want to share a bit of my family and how the book has helped so much with social situations because anxiety for my kids has even affected how they join in at family events as well.

So their anxiety not only affected them at school but also at home the panic attacks didn`t choose places to happen or certain times they could come at school at the shops in the morning or even in the middle of the night they greatly affected not only our children but us as a family on how we interacted with others as well.

we are all learning to let others into our world a little bit each day, we are all rebuilding trust in each other and in those we connect with in our wider family and with schools and doctors and society.

Each person has their own way of coping in these situations, as parents children, teachers doctors but also as friends.

Personally as me i have found it hard to open myself up again, but i am doing so more every day the book helped me deal with the emotions i was personally feeling which in turn helped my children to be more open

and willing to trust again, along the way i will admit i doubted myself and my judgements of situation and for a while when the panic attracts were really bad, now i have learnt that self doubt is something that holds me in that place that was not nice to be in, we are gathering strength and our voices to tell our stories.

Each of us affected by the journey in different way to the other but still it is really one story with many different perspectives of the same situation. i still feel to nervous to do a video update yet just because i get my words muddled a little when talking to people i dont know well, not because i am worried about anyone else judgement but my own.

The reason i have not done the Emo update was purely because the book is for getting my children to the point of joining in more in social situations and building confidence in them, This weekend we put it into to practise and what i saw from my daughter was amazing she had the centre stage a little awkward for a second but then had everyone second, but then had everyone smiling and laughing,

Jake found it just a bit over whelming so spent a lot of his time in his room, but he was not alone because one of his little cousins felt the same and could not handle the amount of people so they spent quite time playing games together, by the end of the day Jake had a room full of little cousins watching him play mine craft a common interest and something for them to talk about they all like to get a conversation going.

This time i didn`t try to do everything myself my mum done some cooking my bother also brought some food my husband helped set up the gazebos, and my oldest son took his brother out the day before and spent quality time with him.

Speaking to family we haven`t seen for awhile was so great, and we all said how it is nice to get together for something positive other than funerals or when something is wrong, our families from all sides have had to deal with so much loss that we kind of went different ways and stuck with our own little families,

My mums side of the family it was the loss of our amazing grandparents that was the beginning, their house was somewhere we all gathered together and had many wonderful family weekends old style no TV no devices just cooking playing gardening and walks funny how advanced the world is now but those times were our happiest.

My dads side of the family ripped apart by a genetic illness Huntington’s taking many lives and also affecting those that dont have it some stayed and some moved away, because how hard it is to see people you love become someone else.

My parents separating had an affect because they were the glue that pulled all sides together funny thing is they are better apart and get on so well they still care a lot for each other, just differently now and finally that is OK was hard for me to deal with even as an adult, but also a little hard for my children because they were a vital and instrumental part of their up bringing.

My Husbands family well they are Greek and have the strongest personalities i know but it also makes them very stubborn too, but even their i see their abilities to really change things and bring them closer together again like it used to because i miss their faces.

My husband and i well you dont go through all that and come out without any dents in your relationship we are still here together 25 years later a little bruised by the journey but still here,Still dedicated to our children but any marriage worth, it is ours it will always be ours no matter what comes our way, good bad, unsure we will always work it out in the end with patience communications validations of how we feel, learning to turn to each other and not hold ourselves back.

This is the most real and honest thing i can say at this time i just wish it was something i could say on video but i am not ready to do that yet.

So to finish off i want too share the beautiful weekend in pictures for you all, to see and share our princesses magic shiny moment.

I am doing this update separate from the one my family sees because i dont want to hurt them with what i have said i want to help reconnect to them all and deal with all these little elephants in the room so they feel they can be more open with each others that has to be a positive thing, because when i am around them all i get my sparkle back.

#newauthor #christmasbook #family #emotions #awareness #grief #autism #anxiety #mentalhealthawareness

https://www.gofundme.com/towards-publishing-fees